Friday, February 5, 2010

Bwana weeeh...

Angekuwa kiwanja huyu...basi hasingeliona jua for a very long time kwani so far nimeshaziona kama tickets 32 na zote ni lazima kwenda kumuona jaji. Mmmh...Bongo kweli hakuna safety kabisaaaa. Hata kama hii style wanaiita "mshkaki" ila hapa nadhani wanatakiwa kuuita pilau kwani kila kitu kimewekwa ndani na haina haja ya mboga wala nini! Sijui hawa watoto ni wake au la hasha! Let me leave him alone kwani kila mtu anajikuna kwa urefu wa mkono wake mwanawane...

Tapeli la week!

Tapeli wa kujitegemea, Martin Elia a.k.a Jump Around...nimekukubali mpwa kwani unakula "BATA" kwa mzee George Washington na vile vile unaliendeleza kwa Baba wa Taifa Mwl. Julius K. Nyerere. That's what I call...enjoying yourself! Huyu cameraman hakunifirahisha, alitakiwa kupiga hii picha kwa mbali zaidi ili niweze kutoa marks kwa mdada huyu hapa kwani so far amepata maswali 23 kati ya 35 ila kumi yapo section B "USAFIRI" na hapa siyaona majibu bado...so next time mdau remember kuchukua picha better enough to get the results!

Mambo gani sasa haya tena?

Mdau wa kulia pichani kweli ni mlevi, kwani huwezi kulea kwa kiasi hicho na kuendelea kuing'ang'ania lager kama vile! Pombe za mchana zina mengi....Huyu mdau wa kushoto nadhani ni mlinzi na sasa anauchapa usingizi kwasababu ya uchovu wa kuwa macho usiku mzima. Hivi unaweza kunisaidia kunipa idea "why" huyu mdau wa kulia ameurusha ulimi wake nje? I was thinking kwamba jamaa anakula nzi kwasababu Bongo kuna nzi wengi na wanakuwa wakubwa kama mbung'o...

Hapa ndiyo kiwanja wewe....

Wewe umeona nchi gani dunia rais anafanya mambo kama haya? Ni US tu pekee. Kweli huku ni kama kuishi zama za Yesu ukiwa Israel yaani unakuwa unakula tunda tu, the only thing you need to do ni kujiunga na msafara wa Yesu basi unatandika menu. Kwanza Janitor kapiga "MTI" chini...Wow! Maisha haya unipeleke popote kule may be kwenda home Bongo tu kusalimia ndugu, jamaa na maadui...Amen!

Jamani hii sasa ni SOO!

Jamani kweli hapa si ni pesa tu? Mzee anaweza kufa na heart attack huyu na bintiye wa mwisho naye wala haogopi kufanya kitendo hiki. Mimi naona kuwekwe umri wa mwisho wa kufanya mampenzi. Mshua amechoka kweli kweli kwani jasho linamtoka kwa kwenda mbele, mimi naona hii style haikumfaa kabisa hasa hasa ukizingatia umri wake ni wa kuwekwa Nursing Home! Ghetto limechoka kinoma, angalia TV na stand yake....damn! Huko ahera kutakuwa na hukumu za ajabu sana, I can't wait!

Mambo ya kawaida jamani...

Kama unaona kuwa kuna kitu kinakufurahisha humu kwenye blog yangu basi hakuna noma kama ukiniangushia sifa mwanangu mwenyewe.....
Washkaji Mungu akipenda tutaonana basi.........ila kumbuka kuwa Mungu ni mmoja na siku zote anafanya maajabu kwahiyo si mbaya kama tukimshuru kwa kila nia.....
Mungu awabariki watu wote wa Dunia hii.Amen!

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?



2
 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 

3
 When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 

4
 When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?   cause I amGonna Kick their asses! 

5
 When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 

6
 People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 


7.
 When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8
 When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?




9
 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass? 

 

If you are having a bad day, remember it could be worse...

If you are having a bad day,  remember it could be worse...