Wednesday, May 28, 2008
CONVERSATION BY LANGUAGE
An Arab was interviewed at the US Embassy for a U.S.A. Visa.
Consul : What is your name?
Arab: Abdul Aziz
Consul: Sex?
Arab : Six to ten times a week
Consul: I mean, male or female?
Arab : both male and female and sometimes even camels
Consul: Holy cow!
Arab : Yes, cows and dogs too!!!!
Consul: Man,...isn ' t it hostile?
Arab :Horse style, dog style, any style
Consul: Oh...dear!
Arab : Deer? No deer, they run too fast!
Consul : What is your name?
Arab: Abdul Aziz
Consul: Sex?
Arab : Six to ten times a week
Consul: I mean, male or female?
Arab : both male and female and sometimes even camels
Consul: Holy cow!
Arab : Yes, cows and dogs too!!!!
Consul: Man,...isn ' t it hostile?
Arab :Horse style, dog style, any style
Consul: Oh...dear!
Arab : Deer? No deer, they run too fast!
WIN 2 TICKETS TO THE OLYMPIC GAMES.
WIN 2 AIRLINE TICKETS ALL EXPENSES PAID TO THE 2008 OLYMPIC GAMES INPEKING ,CHINA .
To participate is very easy, just view the photo, correctly answer the following questions and send your answers to theInternational Olympic Committee:
1. Which student seems to appear tired / sleepy?
2. Which ones are male twins?
3. Which ones are the female twins?
4. How many women are in the group?
5. Which one is the teacher?Good Luck!!!!
THE TAX MAN!
At the end of the tax year, the IRS sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said:
"I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?""Good question", noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles.
"Oh", replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual questionhad a practical answer. But on he went,
in his obnoxious way:
"What about all these biscuit purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?" "Ah, yes", replied the Rabbi, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send a freebox of holy biscuits."
"I see!" replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi", he went on, "What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"
"Here, too, we do not waste", answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins and send them to the IRS, and about once a year they send us a complete dick."
"I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?""Good question", noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles.
"Oh", replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual questionhad a practical answer. But on he went,
in his obnoxious way:
"What about all these biscuit purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?" "Ah, yes", replied the Rabbi, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send a freebox of holy biscuits."
"I see!" replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi", he went on, "What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"
"Here, too, we do not waste", answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins and send them to the IRS, and about once a year they send us a complete dick."
On ma way to work......the sadest day ever in the US!
Yes its Ulimboka....ma homeboy cant wake up and talk to me....Trully hes dead....I miss u!These are my daughters and Uli's Boys!
It seems like Ulimboka is there.....May Almight God bless his soul...Amen!
Ulimboka (R.I.P) on the right...
Ma boy Ernest ready for the night......I don have to put too much introductions...go and google!
Who cares bout the Chiefs...!
Look at this bastard pee outside ma house...kweli Mbongo ni mbongo jamani....Thats ma boy Uli(R.I.P) again outside ma house!
I cant believe I aint gonna kick with u again homeboy.....We'll meet someday though..Peace!What the Hell?
What are u doin Kupas?Pliiz take it slow u gonna end up in Prison and be someones wife...partner!
Mussa is in a buildin too!
Friends tryin to feel at home....u know I alwayz look fly....c'mon u know that!
Mambo haya jamani!
If u wanna know who this is....jus go ahead and google then u should get an answer...Holla!
Is gettin serious here so far!
Msukuma and "ULIMBOKA"-RIP.........tryin to agree on some important issues!
Abel"Poborsky" Chamriho's baby gurl!
The Healthy baby alive in Wichita so far!Kitimoto na Nyamachoma kama kawaida...
Ma first daughter like dad like daughter!
Boys stay away from her she's the next American Top Model in 2021!Believe me!Family first hommies..
I cant believe ma baby is gettin big now....she was a lil one jus yesterday.I'm startin gettin old now.
WHO HAS BEEN HINDERING YOUR GROWTH?
One day all the employees reached the office and they saw a big sign on the door on which it was written: 'Yesterday the person who has been hindering your growth in this Company passed away. We invite you to join the funeral in the room that has been prepared in the gym'. In the beginning, they all got sad for the death of one of their colleagues, but after a while they started getting curious to know who was that man who hindered the growth of his colleagues and the company itself. The excitement in the gym was such that security agents were ordered to control the crowd within the room. The more people reached the coffin, the more the excitement heated up.. Everyone thought: 'Who is this guy who was hindering my progress? Well, at least he died!'. One by one the thrilled employees got closer to The coffin, and when they looked inside it they suddenly became speechless. They stood nearby the coffin, shocked and in silence, as if someone had touched the deepest part of their soul. There was a mirror inside the coffin: everyone who looked inside it could see himself. There was also a sign next to the mirror that said: 'There is only one person who is capable to set Limits to your growth: it is YOU .
Your life does not change when your boss changes, when your friends change, when your parents change, when your partner changes, when your company changes. Your life changes when YOU change, when you go beyond your limiting beliefs. Examine yourself, watch yourself. Don't be afraid of difficulties,impossibilities and losses: be a winner, build yourself and your reality..
It's the way you face Life that makes the difference!
One day all the employees reached the office and they saw a big sign on the door on which it was written: 'Yesterday the person who has been hindering your growth in this Company passed away. We invite you to join the funeral in the room that has been prepared in the gym'. In the beginning, they all got sad for the death of one of their colleagues, but after a while they started getting curious to know who was that man who hindered the growth of his colleagues and the company itself. The excitement in the gym was such that security agents were ordered to control the crowd within the room. The more people reached the coffin, the more the excitement heated up.. Everyone thought: 'Who is this guy who was hindering my progress? Well, at least he died!'. One by one the thrilled employees got closer to The coffin, and when they looked inside it they suddenly became speechless. They stood nearby the coffin, shocked and in silence, as if someone had touched the deepest part of their soul. There was a mirror inside the coffin: everyone who looked inside it could see himself. There was also a sign next to the mirror that said: 'There is only one person who is capable to set Limits to your growth: it is YOU .
Your life does not change when your boss changes, when your friends change, when your parents change, when your partner changes, when your company changes. Your life changes when YOU change, when you go beyond your limiting beliefs. Examine yourself, watch yourself. Don't be afraid of difficulties,impossibilities and losses: be a winner, build yourself and your reality..
It's the way you face Life that makes the difference!
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